The Poring
by zhakeena
Summary: (Crossover: RO and the Manwha) A Poring causes Chaos and co. more confusion than it's worth. Gah. 6th chapter up.
1. Big Bad Chaos

_Author's notes: In an attempt to unify Ragnarok Online players and Ragnarok Manwha readers, I did a crossover. Yay! _

**The Poring **

**1: Big Bad Chaos**

Disclaimer: Ragnarok is a manwha created by Myung-Jin Lee, while Ragnarok Online belongs to Gravity Corp.Oh, yeah… This thing is AU, because I don't think there's enough of a time gap in the Manwha story for this to fill in. Enjoy!

"Iris, goddammit! Stop dodging and attack it!"

"EEEEE! I don't wanna! It might hit meeeee!" Iris screeched as the Argiope almost scratched her heel.

"Oh, for the love of Odin…" Chaos muttered to himself as he ran over the giant centipede thing and raised his sword. "Bash!" he yelled. A very hard blow to the head caused the Argiope to pass out. It magically dissolved into thin air, and left a pretty decapitated bug's leg in its place.

Chaos looked over to Iris sternly. Iris was sitting on the ground, innocently twiddling her thumbs. "Iris…"

"Aaah! I'm soooo sorry, Chaos! I won't ever do it again! It's just that…" she shuddered at the memory of the Argiope, "Bugs scare me."

"But you won't grow stronger unless you kill these things on your own!" he said in a reprimanding tone.

"But… can't we just go down Mt. Mjolnir and… kill other things?..." Iris asked.

"Nah… I think Lidia's still hunting for something here… you know, the big pink thing with the wings…" Chaos sighed as he fell on the ground next to her, carelessly tossing Vision next to him.

Iris puffed her cheeks. "She's just hoarding more rare stuff, and using Loki and Fenris to kill the monsters for her so she can get the loot!"

"Yeah, well… _sometimes, _she does give us a share. And even though it's only about 10%... she still gives us a large amount of money…"

"Hmph…" Iris lay her head on the ground, her eyes closed. But when she opened her eyes again, she found herself face-to-face… with an Argos.

Chaos flinched at the ear-splitting shriek that followed.

She barely dodged an attack. If they were characters in Ragnarok the Online Game, she would have taken in 120 points of damage. "Chaos!!!" she yelled for help as she wildly swung the Chernyongdo randomly at the gigantic spider attacking her.

"You're doing great!" Chaos called out.

"NO I'M NOT!!!" Iris yelled in frustration. _Hiss._Another 100 points of damage.

The Rune Knight sighed. "Hold on, I'm coming…" And he reached out next to him for his sword.

Except that what he touched was soft, fleshy and incredibly gooey.

"What the—…" he turned to look at what he supposed was his Vision turned to goo. What he saw was a cute li'l Poring, which just finished swallowing his beloved sword.

His eyes widened. "YOU MISERABLE PINK—…" he started, and he raised his fist in a move to kill the Poring.

Upon seeing this, Iris gasped and sliced the Argos' eyes off, then ran towards the Poring and nabbed it before Chaos could make it burst into useless pink jelly. "DON'T KILL THE PORING!!!" she screeched.

Chaos stopped in awe. "Did… you just kill that Argos in one blow…?" he asked, a ridiculous look on his face.

She wasn't listening; she was too busy trying to calm down the Poring which was still shivering because it just saw its life flash before its eyes. "Aaaw… little cutie… I hope big bad Chaos didn't harm you, did he?..."

"Big… bad…" Chaos stammered. "Whaddya mean, Big Bad Chaos?! It ate Vision! How am I supposed to get it back?! You think they sell that thing in stores?!"

"We'll find a way to get your Vision back without harming the Poring… I think it's just cruel to kill it just because it thought your sword was yummy!" she said.

He gritted his teeth. "Don't tell me… you're going to keep it?"

Iris looked up at him with puppy eyes.

"Aaaaaw…" he moaned. "What am I going to do with you…" From behind him, Loki, Fenris and a happy Lidia with Sessy on her shoulders with a full bag of loot walked towards them.

"Hi, you guys! Look, look!" Iris showed them the Poring. The three of them looked at it with feigned interest.

"Hah! That's nothing! Look!" Lidia took out a pair of beautiful wings from her backpack. "We found the Angeling on the way here, and Loki and Fenris killed it, and it dropped these! I put 'em on a helm, sell it to a sucker and I'm… I mean, we're rich!"

"Yeah! These babies sell good in the black market!" Sessy added jokingly.

Fenris cleared her throat. "Of course, Lidia helped us kill it…" she said with a subtle sarcastic tone.

"Sure I did! I lured those Poporings away from you guys, didn't I?" Lidia said defensively.

"… which, in turn, you lured towards a helpless Mage who got lost in the mountains," said Loki.

Lidia pouted, but she hugged Loki instantly. "Aaaaw you're so cute when you're like that! Heehee!"

Everyone (including the Poring) face-faulted.

"Chaos," Loki said, trying to ignore Lidia, "where is your weapon?"

Chaos answered by pointing angrily at the Poring in Iris' arms.

"Hey! Watch it! You're scaring the Poring!" Iris yelled.

"I wanna scare it to death, that's what I wanna do! I want my Vision back now!!!" Chaos wailed.

The Cleric lay the Poring on the ground. _Fine, I'll sugar-coat it! _She thought as she hugged Chaos' arm. "Aaaaw… please? We can name it after you, if you like! It's just sooooo cute!" she said as sweetly as she could.

"No, no, no…" Chaos said, blocking his ears.

Fenris sighed at the sight. _Not again… _she thought to herself. _Why do they choose to flirt in front of me? _

Her thoughts were abruptly interrupted when she felt something… glomp her… well… her butt. Her face froze. She shuddered, then let out a full-volume shriek that echoed all throughout the mountain. The party almost felt the earth shaking.

Everybody froze. The now-dangerous warlock turned around… and saw that the Poring wasn't glomping her butt at all, but was attempting to eat the Laevatein that hung at her back. "You…" she said dangerously.

The Poring swallowed her weapon, looked up at her with puppy eyes, and when Fenris' facial expression didn't change, it hastily hopped behind Iris. The next thing anybody knew, an OOC Fenris was being held back by Loki and Chaos. "LET ME AT IT! LET ME AT IT!" she shrieked. Iris held the Poring away from her now deranged friend. "No, Fenris, it didn't mean it! It's Poring Nature!"

Fenris calmed down. Loki and Chaos loosened their grips on her arms. She breathed in deeply. "It ate my weapon, Iris… what are you going to do about it?"

Iris swallowed hard. "W…ell…. We could ask the Pet Merchant in Prontera… I'm sure it's an expert in Poring care!" she suggested hastily.

"Yes… I'm sure… he is…" Fenris flipped her hair. "Well, I suggest we go now before… it gets dark…" she said as she stepped ahead of them.

"… I'm scared…" Chaos whispered to Loki.

"Well… most people have an uncontrolled emotion beneath the surface and it takes an unexpected thing like that to unleash those…" Loki's answer was cut short when he noticed something wrong.

"Loki, anything wrong?"

He looked down. The Poring was beside him. It just swallowed something.

He looked at his side. The Swords of the Shadows were no longer where they used to be.

"Uh-oh…" Sessy said softly.

Later, a very very frightened Iris carrying a burping Poring was being chased at super speed by a very angered Loki, with Chaos, Fenris and Lidia with Sessy running behind them as fast as they could.


	2. Celebrities of Prontera

**The Poring **

**2: Celebrities of Prontera **

Disclaimers: Please refer to Chapter one.

"Wow… we reached Prontera faster than we should have!" said Lidia.

"Yeah! We should be happy about it! Come on, everybody, a little happiness!" Iris said nervously. Chaos, Loki and Fenris didn't reply. They just glared at the Poring she was cradling in her arms. (How she carried a big thing like that is beyond them.)

The Poring was too fascinated with the large city they just entered. Its eyes were like a little boy's eyes in a candy store… the candy being the random passers-by's items.

"Hey, look… the Pet Merchant," Sessy pointed her tails towards a guy with green hair selling little back-packs to a group of merchants.

"Oh! Thank goodness!" Iris ran ahead with the Poring. _If I stay with those three any longer, they might eat me alive, _she thought.

As the redhead ran ahead, Lidia said, "Well, I'll leave you three to decide whether you're gonna keep her alive or not… I'll just be around town, trying to nab—I mean, deal with somebody for a helm. Ok, see ya," she ran ahead. Sessy waved to them with her paw.

Chaos, Loki and Fenris grudgingly made their way towards the Pet Merchant. Iris was already talking with him. "So, Mister, could you help us with this? See, my pet Poring ate my friends' weapons, and they think the only way to get them back is to kill it…" she explained.

The Pet Merchant frowned. "Your pet ate them? Are you sure you tamed that?" he asked.

Iris blinked. "Tamed?"

The green-haired man sighed. "Usually, you need this to tame a Poring," he explained, showing her a green unripe apple. The Poring, shiny-eyed, looked at it hungrily. "Once you feed this, you can make it do whatever you want… unless you forget to regularly feed it, of course."

"What do Porings eat? Asides from random items, that is," she asked.

"It loves apples, but it becomes fuller with Apple Juice. You interested in buying?"

Iris thought for a while before saying, "How much?..."

"5000 zennies for the unripe apple; 150 each for Apple Juice," said the merchant.

"I'll take—…" Iris began, but Chaos cut her off. "We ain't buying. Thanks, but we'll just kill the thing, Okaaay?" he said, forcing a grin.

The Pet Merchant frowned. _Another sale down the drain, _he thought. But then, he recognized Chaos' face. A smile crept on his lips. "Oh… is that so? I thought that the Heroes of Prontera would act kinder towards helpless friendly monsters than that," he said.

"Wha… what?" Chaos stammered. At the mention of 'Heroes of Prontera', many random people flocked towards them. They all stared in awe at them.

"Oooh… what's that the Merchant was saying? The Great Chaos wants to kill a Poring? How cruel!" an Acolyte whispered to a Priest, who nodded his head solemnly.

"If you ask me, it's kind of amateurish, killing everything in sight. A Novice won't level up killing that thing, for crying out loud. And I thought he was a hero," a Knight whispered to his guildmates. The whole guild sniggered.

"Ooh, check out that pig-tailed chick with that guy! Wonder why she's hanging around that loser…" a Novice yelled from the crowd.

Then, "OH MY GAWD! It's Loki! He's sooooooooooooo cute up close!" a group of girl Assassins from the known Assassin's guild in Morroc squealed in delight. "Is he with Fenris? Aah, not to worry, we'll just kill her when she's not looking, then we can kidnap Loki and carry him to our shrine!" They squealed again.

Loki and Fenris sweat-dropped. Chaos wanted to pull out his hair in frustration. "No… you don't understand… We can't save the world without our weapons!!!"

"Then you have to buy my stuff," answered the Pet Merchant, rubbing his hands together.

"We don't have enough zennies… we still wanna eat, you know," he said.

"You're the heroes! You should have enough money by now," the Pet Merchant said.

"Wait a sec," Iris piped up, placing the Poring on the floor and fishing out something from her pockets. She came up with a large number of bug's legs, jellopies, and cobwebs. "How much are these?" she asked.

"Hmm…. Around 2,000 zennies."

Iris frowned. "If I throw in… uh… Chaos' Jacket?"

"Hey!" Chaos said in protest.

"OOH! OOH! I'll buy it for… 400,000 zennies!" a merchant yelled.

Chaos' and Iris' jaws dropped.

"Ah… ah… I'm not giving up my jacket for that thing, goddammit! We'll be going to Al de Baran, remember? It's cold there!" the Rune Knight protested as soon as he regained his voice.

"Ok, fine! Well, we still have around 8,000 zennies with us, so that's 10,000 zennies… If I buy the unripe apple and around 20 apple juices…" Iris did the math in her head. Fenris finished ahead of her, "We'll be left with 2000 zennies…"

"… We'll barely survive a week, the way you two have a great ability for throwing money away," Loki added.

Iris fell silent before piping up cheerily, "Aaaw… a week's a long time! I'll take 'em!"

"NO YOU'RE NOT!!!" Chaos yelled, suddenly grabbing Iris by the waist and running off with her awaaaaaay from the Merchant.

"CHAOS! Put me down! I don't have Chaos jr. with meeeee!" Iris' wail faded as they got farther away from the crowds.

Loki and Fenris were left with Chaos jr. and the Pet Merchant. "Well, are you two gonna buy?"

The Assassin gave the Merchant a death glare before carrying the Poring by himself. "We must follow them… Prontera is bigger than Geffen, so it's easier for them to get lost," he told Fenris.

She nodded, noticing how funny he looked carrying the Poring. "Are… you sure you want to carry… Chaos jr?" she asked.

"Is there a problem?"

Fenris bit her lip. "No, no problem," she said, walking ahead and trying not to smile.

People of all classes sniggered as the sight of Loki and Chaos jr. passed them by.

---

Author's notes: Corny no? I can't help it if I have a rusty sense of humor. Hahahah.


	3. We Have Company

**The Poring **

By: zhakeena

**3 **

"Heehee," Lidia snickered as she attached the Angel Wings on the helm still labeled, 'Gary's'. "So, whaddya think, Ses? Look authentic enough?"

"Ooh… it looks expensive enough… let's sell it!" Sessy answered, purring afterwards. "Oh, look who it is…" she said, her ears perking up.

"Oh, them," Lidia said blankly as they saw Chaos and Iris and the huge dust clouds they left behind, which are currently choking many of the Pronteran citizens. "So… what happened to the happy couple's pet?" she said jokingly.

"Iris… almost spent… 8k for the stupid Poring! And worse, she named it after me, too!" Chaos said, still fuming.

Iris pouted. "You're so cheap. I thought you wanted Vision back!"

"It was simple enough killing the Poring, but noooo…"

Somebody behind them cleared his/her throat. It was Fenris. "You two left the Poring back there," she said with all self control.

Chaos facial expression changed radically, his angry one replaced by a goofy grin. "Loki carried it all the way here?"

Loki frowned. "Is there a problem?" he repeated.

Iris giggled. "You look… ridiculous with that thing! Look! Chaos jr.'s imitating your facial expression!"

Loki looked down on the Poring. The Poring looked up at its carrier, its eyes wide and serious, its mouth curled into the best serious frown it can manage. Loki looked up again. "I fail to see what's so amusing…" He dropped the Poring on the floor, but the Poring jumped back in his arms.

"Aaaw… It likes you!"

The assassin frowned. Iris was laughing hysterically. Lidia was guffawing. Sessy was purring mockingly. Chaos was… making a sound that was either a snort or a laugh. Even Fenris was giggling then. He handed it to Iris, in hopes of saving some poise. "Please keep it away from me."

Chaos poked his ribs. "But it LIKES you!!!" he said jokingly.

"Quiet," he said in irritation. "I suggest we drop this silliness now, before…"

"But it LIIIIKES you!!!!"

_Punch._

"Ow…" Chaos nursed a new bump on his bumpy head. "Loki, that hurt."

"I intended it to."

"Anyway," Fenris said, clearing her throat, "we musn't let that Poring get in the way of our journey. What do we do next?" she asked, looking at Chaos.

"Hmn," Chaos said, attempting to think as he rubbed his new bump, "I guess we're stuck in Prontera for a while… we'd better find an inn then. Who's got a map?"

Lidia handed a map over. "Got it from Gary, too, eh?" asked Sessy.

Chaos flipped the map open. "Lessee… we're right here, right?" he asked, pointing to a random spot on the map.

Iris shook her head. "Nope, we're here, see? Look, that's the Flower Merchant and everything…"

"No, I'm pretty sure that's the Veggie Lady…"

Chaos and Iris argued with themselves on which direction they'll be headed to next. Lidia was writing "S Angel Helm" messily on a signboard. Fenris wised up and started asking passers-by on where to go. Loki was… standing there. And the Poring.

Boy, it was getting bored.

It looked up, disinterested, at its new 'owners'. Nobody was doing anything exciting. _Oh well, _the Poring thought, _better stir up some action then. _

Ooh. _I sense something… _it thought, looking over to the Veggie Lady. It smiled. Almost sinisterly…

Loki stared as it hopped happily over one of the popular Veggie Lady's customers. _This does not bode well, _he thought.

* * *

The Veggie Lady[1] wanted to scream, abandon her veggies, and head for the hills. But courtesy demanded that she keep smiling, do her job as usual… and ignore the fact that one of her customers looked like a deranged Goth Rocker with an affinity to one of those people in the Wanted posters that the Prontera Chivalry puts up everywhere… or like a member of Kiss.

"… and maybe I'll have some of those sweet potatoes, too. Ahah" Skurai said, pointing to a bushel of sweet potatoes.

"Eh… so… cucumbers, tomatoes, apples, sweet potatoes… Ehem… that will be 124 zennies…"

"And a pumpkin! Add a pumpkin!"

"159 zennies."

Skurai got his pretty black coin purse (with the skulls and everything, so it would match with his outfit) and paid the Veggie Lady. The Veggie Lady, in turn, gave a weak smile and said a meek, "Thank you, come again," to the Cursed Prosecutor. Even though she was deathly curious on what he might want with all those veggies (could be that he's a vegetarian, or a gourmet chef on the side but it will be a bit strange since he quote-unquote searches the world for blood), but she didn't dare ask.

"Ahaha! I _will _come again, thank you!" he said. The Veggie Merchant forced a smile again. "Okay, Talatsu, let's jet!" he said to the sword beside him.

"Er… Skurai… a problem…" the Talatsu's voice said in a quavering voice.

"Huh?" The man looked to his side… and saw that his ever-beloved Talatsu was half consumed by a Poring already.

"What the---?!" he screeched. "Leggo! Leggo!"

"Mrmphg!" the Poring 'said' in reply. Of course, it didn't wanna let go…

* * *

"…. We're dead," mumbled Loki as he sped towards the Veggie Merchant. Fenris and Lidia saw where he was headed… and face-faulted. "Oh. My. Gawd," said the thief, turning blue. "Fenris… tell me I'm not seeing the Poring eating Skurai's weapon…"

"You're seeing it clearly, Lidia," replied Fenris, regretfully. She started running after Loki.

"Oh, crap--!" Lidia said, puffing up her cheeks. "Come on, Ses! Let's jet!"

"But, Lidia, if Skurai goes mad…"

"Never mind that! Fenris has most of their loot!" she said, dragging her cat with her as she sped away towards the Veggie Merchant.

Meanwhile, Chaos and Iris are _still _arguing on where they're standing. "… you think there's a guard nearby?"

* * *

"Ahah! You insolent little pink thing, you--!!!" screamed Skurai, swinging the uneaten part of Talatsu madly in an attempt to shake the Poring off.

"Skurai… it ate our veggies too," said Talatsu blankly. Only then did Skurai find out that the Poring _did _eat his veggies… the more madly he swung the Talatsu around. "That's it! I'm eating that Poring raw!" he screeched.

"No."

Skurai spun around. Loki was standing a few good feet away from him. The audience who crowded to see Skurai fight the Poring previously parted like the Red Sea, clearing the space between them.

"Oh… if it isn't the Assassins' Guild's puppet," the Prosecutor smirked.

_Whoosh. _The wind added a dramatic effect. It was like watching a coupla cowboys (in skin-tight suits, that is) about to sic at each other.

"The moment the Poring dies… so will you. Skurai," said Loki in a looooow voice. (A few female thieves and swordies swooned in the background.)

"Ooh. I'm scared," Skurai said mockingly. "Why so protective of the Poring? Don't tell me Mr. Quiet but Deadly has a Poring for a pet?!"

Loki twitched. Fenris and Lidia with Sessy stopped in their tracks and watched. "The Poring. Now."

"I wish I could, but as you can see," he gestured towards the half-eaten Talatsu, "it doesn't want to go with you yet."

"It's no joyride for me, either," mumbled Talatsu under his breath. "AAAH!"

The Poring finally swallowed it whole. Along with Skurai's hand. But luckily, Skurai managed to pull out his hand before it ate him too. "AAAH! You--!" he screeched in a horrible, grating voice.

It just burped in response.

"Hey, aren't you glad? You're finally free!!!" said Lidia mockingly.

"No I'm not!" Skurai screeched impatiently. "That's it! I'm punching it open!" Before anybody could make a move, Skurai's fist already collided with the Poring's surface… Everybody screeched and covered their eyes. (Well… it would be funny if Loki screeched, but he didn't; he just winced slightly.)

Silence.

The Poring still said, "Meep." What everybody expected was a pile of pink blob, devoured weapons and jellopy by that time was still a very whole Poring.

"The hell?!" Skurai growled, punching it repeatedly. His fist just bounced against the Poring's outer surface.

"Hahahah lolz lolz u iz weak!!1111 PVP" commented a Novice from the sidelines.

Loki curiously approached the madman and the monster. Engaging his bone armor, he used one pointy bone-gloved finger to poke the Poring. It didn't even flinch. "Interesting…"

"Whoa. That's one tough baby there," Sessy said, tails twitching.

"Ja? Let me try that!" said a brown-haired Knight[2], ready for action. His guildmates crowded around him and the Poring, ooh-ing and aah-ing. "Sir Luke! Let us see your strength, then…"

Without further ado, the 'Sir Luke' character raised his mighty Claymore… which didn't do a thing, really. It just bounced harmlessly on the Poring's head. "Eh? What the—"

"Ooh! Ooh! Let me try!!!" Several wizards, priests, swordsmen, crusaders, super-novices, bards, et al up for a challenge stepped up in hopes of destroying the Poring. Swords, Arrows, spells, guitar strings, and knives didn't do a thing to damage the Poring…

"What the hell?!"

"Is this an MVP Boss[3] or something?!"

"AAA! It hit me!" screeched a female swordie. Everybody gaped at the 1,501 points of damage it did to her…

"What the hell?!" screamed Lidia.

Fenris held her chin thoughtfully. "This might be the effect of eating the Talatsu…" she said. Loki, Skurai and Lidia gasped, but listened as she continued, "The Poring might have absorbed some of Talatsu's powers. Talatsu has a mind of its own, unlike our weapons, which are worthless without us using them. The Poring knew how to use its power to its advantage. Frankly, I'm impressed," she explained, nodding.

"So, you mean, unless we get it to barf out Talatsu, the Poring's invincible?" Lidia asked. Fenris nodded.

Skurai shook his head before bursting out into hysterical laughs. "AHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! So, you're saying, unless I go with you people, I wouldn't be able to get Talatsu back?"

The three froze. "I… I guess so…" Fenris replied weakly.

Skurai held his chin thoughtfully. "Well, this is interesting… In order to beat my enemies, I have to accompany them and actually help them out with something… Ahah" he thought to himself, smiling wickedly. "Hey, stop that! I don't like the way you're smiling, ya hear?!" Lidia whined.

"He changes moods pretty fast," Sessy muttered.

"Okay! But you have to buy me veggies first! Oh, and I must hold the Poring," Skurai said, picking it up and hugging it, "or I shall age very quickly."

"What?"

"Remember that I'm older than I look. Talatsu's been preventing me from aging. If I don't have Talatsu by my side, I'll be an old man in an hour… see? I grew crow's feet 10 minutes ago." Skurai explained, pointing to his eyes.

Silence.

"You do realize that we could use that against you." Loki said flatly.

"Ahah" Skurai replied, skipping over to the Veggie Merchant, hugging the Poring. "My new comrades shall pay for the veggies this time!" he said cheerfully to the Veggie Merchant.

"AH! I know! We're right at _this _spot here! See? That's the Kafra right there…" Iris said, pointing to a spot in the map and gesturing towards the brown-haired Kafra nearby, dealing with a few other people.

"Hey, you might be right… So we go here, since it's the nearest inn… Eh?" Chaos' pondering was interrupted when somebody tapped at his shoulder. "Oi! Loki! What's… up…" he trailed off and paled. Along with Loki were Fenris, Lidia, Sessy… and Skurai with "Chaos Jr.".

"We have company," said Fenris weakly.

* * *

[1] – Veggie Lady / Veggie Merchant: One of those nice NPC's found in Prontera (Ragnarok Online, that is). She sells vegetables.

[2] – Sir Luke: Cameo appearance by one of my brother's characters in pRO.

[3] – MVP Boss: Freakishly strong monster-bosses that appear in specific places and sometimes even in towns. They're rather hard to beat, and if you manage to beat one, you're a pretty accomplished RO player. --

Author's notes: I realize how OOC some characters might have been here (especially Skurai). But I couldn't figure out a better way to make the story progress while keeping them in character, so if I've managed to annoy some of you, my apologies.


	4. Talatsu disabled me to think of a witty ...

**The Poring **

**4 :**** Talatsu unabled me to think of a witty title :) **

_XooXXXX000OOxxO0x! _

Chaos dropped the map. It flew with the wind and hit a random guard. "…!!!" Apparently, the sight of the Cursed Prosecutor embracing the Poring in such a manner was too much for him. The Rune Knight was at a loss for words.

Iris' eyes were almost bulging out of their eye sockets. "Oh my Odin!" she yelled. "Wha… wha… What the hel is he doing with Chaos Jr?!" she rushed over to Skurai and attempted to nab the monster from him, but he dodged. "Ahah! Oh no you don't, little girl!"

Sobbing, Iris turned to Fenris for an explanation. The older woman sighed, "We didn't have a choice… that thing ate Talatsu… and it made itself invincible. He's coming with us until we find a way to get our weapons back…"

"But… what is he doing to him?!" the Cleric pointed an accusing finger towards Skurai… who was rubbing its cheek against the Poring's cheek.

"I can't help it! 'tis so cuuuuuuuuuuuute!" he replied. The Poring looked at them with a confused (and slightly frightened) look in its black, beady eyes.

"AAAH! I can't take it! Give it back!"

"No! Ahah! I shall become an old man in mere hours!" The two of them fought for the handle and care of the Poring. The others sweatdropped.

"Chaos. Where shall we head off to next?" Loki asked, struggling to keep his facial expression the way it is usually. (which is the somewhat denser-than-wood look that he is so loved for.)

"Eh…" Chaos scratched his head. "The nearest inn here is that a-way," he pointed to a building with a windmill in the distance. "But I don't think we have enough money to accommodate 6 people…"

"Skurai has money. More than enough money…" A deep voice suddenly boomed.

Silence.

"Whozzat?" asked Chaos.

"It is I," said the Poring, still in Skurai's arms. Its normally innocent and cute facial expression is now twisted into an eviler… sinister one.

"AAAAAH! IT'S POSSESSED!" screeched Iris and Lidia, both hiding behind the other men.

"No, you dolts! The Poring isn't the one talking! It is I, Talatsu, who is the one talking! I'm just using this hideous, pink thing to speak!" Talatsu in the Poring said in annoyance.

"Oh! My dear Poring's in demonic possession!" Iris began sobbing again. Talatsu, in the Poring's jelly body, sighed in a long-suffering manner.

"Eh! Talatsu!!! How are you?!" Skurai said joyfully, holding the Poring close to his face.

"Oh, actually, never better. I had the most marvelous conversation with the Laevatein and the Swords of the Shadows regarding who could possibly have married Baphomet and who in the blue blazes could Bapho Jr's mother be1…" Talatsu muttered sarcastically.

"… really?"

"Of course not! It's absolutely horrid in this creature's guts! It's so… _pink! _Ugh!" Talatsu twisted the Poring's facial expression into a disgusted one.

"Excuse me…" Fenris stepped up to meet the Poring's eye (or rather, the Poring's Talatsu-possessed eye.). She contemplated first on how weird she might have looked at that time before asking, "Have you found a way to get out on your own?"

"My dear Warlock, the only way to do that is to induce this creature to either vomit or to defecate us out. Although we are willing to be removed out of this body in such distasteful manners, the Poring doesn't have the capacity to do so," replied the Talatsu. "Your Laevatein, also, isn't too keen on the idea itself…"

"The Laevatein can talk?2" asked Loki.

"Sure. I'll put him on." The Poring's evil countenance disappeared. In a few seconds, it had a whitish glow about it. It spoke. "Mistress?"

"… Laevatein? How are you?" asked Fenris, her voice getting a sentimental tone.

"'tis very uncomfortable here, yes, but for most part, I and the other weapons are fine. Although the Vision is getting cranky," The Poring's face was a concerned one, similar to the Laevatein's mistress. At the mention of Vision getting cranky, all eyes turned to Chaos. _Like master, like weapon._ "Luckily, the Poring cannot digest us."

"That's a relief," sighed Fenris. The Poring transformed back into Talatsu mode. "Now, I suggest you people start moving now before the crowds get suspicious…" it said.

"Oh… right! Well, Skurai, since the lodgings are on you, you lead the way," Chaos said with a smug grin. Skurai narrowed his eyes a bit before he led the way. The others trailed behind him.

(Somewhere, a certain blonde, tanned woman was shopping at the Prontera Weaponry shop. "Ooh. Knives. Hee hee! 3")

_xxXXooo00oooXXOoooXo! _

The party got a room for the men and a room for the women, but they all hung out at the men's room for the time being, discussing possible ways on obtaining their weapons from inside the invincible Poring's gut. (Men's room, of course, does not pertain to the gentlemen's bathroom.)

Chaos opened its mouth. Saliva dripped all over his hand, but he still found the guts to stick his head in the Poring's mouth. "Nope. I don't think we can pull it out from there…"

"I told you so. We seem to be in another dimension. Truly, this Poring is a strange creature," Talatsu's voice said through the Poring. "And it's not a great place…"

"Stop talking like that! You're corrupting Chaos Jr!" Iris whined.

"Ahahahah! Corrupting is what I do for a living, my dear child!"

"Talatsu, behave!" said Skurai, still hugging the Poring.

"Maybe we should get Laevatein to possess it first…" suggested Loki.

"Geez, it laughs like Skurai…" Sessy mumbled to Lidia. Then, in a lower whisper, "You still plannin' ta nab that Poring of theirs…?"

"Sure… but keep quiet or else they'll find out!" Lidia whispered through gritted teeth.

_XXxxxOOOOoooxx00xO!_

"Good night, Fenris! Good night, Lidia! I'm turning in…" Iris lay on her bed, wiggling under the covers. "Aaah… I'm exhausted…"

Fenris, with her gauntlets, bolero and accessories off, was still combing her wet hair. She had just finished taking a bath. "Good night, Iris," she said as she fixed her hair in front of the mirror. In a few minutes, the younger girl fell asleep, snoring soundly. "Lidia, Sessy… how about you two?"

Lidia still hadn't dressed down; she still had her armor and all that. "Oh… I might be staying up… reading, you know. Hehe!" she was holding her Treasure Hunter's Bible with her as she sat on a couch upright.

"Yep! She has to find out where to look for the… the Jotunheim treasures. Hehe!" Sessy answered.

The warlock turned to the thief and her cat curiously. "Oh? I see. Why don't you take your armor off?"

"Well, uh, er… I don't want to. Somebody might steal them while we're asleep, you know. Security!" Lidia reasoned, her cheeks flushing a little.

Fenris narrowed her eyes at her before conceding, "I suppose… but you should take them off anyway. You might get a back-ache tomorrow morning."

"I'll risk it," she said, standing up and going towards Fenris. "Aren't you turning in yet?"

"No… I want to read a bit first," she got a book from one of the drawers of the dresser. "I borrowed this from the owner of the inn."

"AHAHAHAH! You don't wanna read a boring ol' book all night, do ya, Fenris?" Lidia pulled the book from her grasp.

"Yeah! You'll overuse your brain!" Sessy meowed.

Fenris stared at her strangely before getting the book back from her. "Yes… I want to read the book. I'm not sleepy yet…" she said, controlling her annoyance. "Are you up to something again, Lidia?"

"Oh! You wanna sleep! I got Spore-spores here! They'll make you sleepy! Here!" Without further ado, Lidia blew a handful of mushroom spores3 onto Fenris' face. The warlock instantly fell to the ground, KO'd. Her body hitting the floor made a loud "THUD" against the wooden floor.

"Oops," Lidia tried to stifle her giggling. "Sorry, Fen! I didn't think you'd fall asleep that fast!" she tried carrying her to her bed, but she couldn't carry the taller woman; she just let her lay on the floor and put a pillow beside her and covered her with a blanket. "Do you think it's suspicious the way she's sleeping on the floor like that…?" asked Sessy.

"Nah… Besides, I'll be gone by the morning… Heehee! We'll be rich, Ses! Rich!" Lidia said, walking to the door, her feline purring (softly) on her shoulders. "Come on, we gotta be real quiet…" They tiptoed their way towards the room where the men were soundly sleeping.

_XxXxoOo0xxXo0xx! _

Loki was annoyed.

First, he didn't get to the shower first, Skurai did. He had to endure listening to the Cursed Prosecutor singing "I Believe In A Thing Called Love"4 in the shower, falsetto and all. Loudly. (Chaos, surprisingly, wasn't annoyed by this since he was grooving to the tune… even head-banging at some point.)

Then, when they were all eating Payonese take-out, he discovered that most of the food had Pecopeco5 meat in them. He, being the assassin that he is, doesn't stand for eating Pecopeco (since he thinks they're utterly cute… but of course, he wouldn't admit it). He didn't touch the food.

And finally, when he was turning in, he heard Skurai threaten to give him and Chaos a good-night kiss. Of course, Skurai was just kidding, but this thought disturbed him… very much. So much that he couldn't sleep, expecting that any minute now, that Cursed Prosecutor will make a move, placing those two black lips of his on some spot on his face, leaving a black kiss-mark that the girls next door wouldn't particularly approve of.

Well, Loki wasn't going to let him. As the two snored on, he lay awake on his side, turned away from them and the doorway, bone armor disabled, but ready at anytime now…

Through the wall separating him from the girls, he heard Fenris' and Lidia's muffled voices. Fenris' tone was normal, but Lidia's sounded quite… hysterical. The assassin didn't mind it at first since the party's very used to Lidia being hysterical and things. But then, the horrible "THUD" came.

It was so loud, it would have woken up a few good demi-humans… but looking briefly to his side, he noted that his two roomies' slumbers weren't disturbed at all. In fact, they were sleeping quite soundly (with Chaos mumbling something about Iris, birthday cake and red potions while Skurai giggled "Ahah" every now and then, a sedated Poring in Talatsu mode still in his arms.)

Loki lay his head back down. "Hmph," he thought to himself in mild annoyance. "If this inn will catch fire, I won't carry those two outside…"

His thoughts were disturbed when he heard somebody try to pick the lock of the door from the outside. "…?!" reacted Loki. He was prepared to jump up and slay the person who was trying to intrude, but he decided to see who it is first and to give a surprise attack.

The door opened slowly, the persona delicately pushing it so as not to make any creaking sounds at all. Loki heard it tip-toe, ever so silently, towards the man next to him… Skurai.

He heard a whisper, "This guy's hand is too heavy…!!!"

"Don't make a sound, remember?!"

Lidia and Sessy.

Loki frowned. He noticed the slight shift of mood in the ambience of the room when the two thieves managed to nab the Poring and get their selves out of the room. The assassin waited for a while before deciding to use his one of his least favorite skills against them:

Stalking. (No actually, them assassins christened a new name for this: Cloaking, was it? Loki couldn't care less, since he really didn't like to use this skill…)

With his "Super Speedy Assassin of the Cross skills", he ran across the ceiling, making sure that the shadows hid his form perfectly. He followed Lidia out of the inn.

_XoooXXXXOo00xxXx! (Oh for the love of a divider…)_

1 – Baphomet is a gigantic MVP Boss in RO. He looks kind of like a giant goat with a scythe. He also has a smaller version, Baphomet Jr, which could be adopted by players as a pet.

2 – Yes, Laevatein can talk, but it only did so in Book 1. Whether it's a male or female is beyond me, though. (For those of you who do not know what Laevatein is… it's Fenris' magic staff. It extends and everything, and high on both offense and magic. Cool, huh?)

3 – Being attacked by these walking mushrooms called "Spores" can sometimes make your character fall asleep. I assumed it's because of them darn spores you can pick up…

4 – I Believe In A Thing Called Love is a song performed by The Darkness. Can't you just imagine Skurai singing that? Hee hee!

5 – Think Chocobo.

Author's notes: AAAH! School's taking its toll on me… sigh Anyways, enjoy the chapter? I hope so.  
Sara Irine's coming up in the next chapter. She should have been in this one, but this one got too long, so… there! Sorry bout that! But it's good to know that there are Sara fans out there... Yay!  
Final note: Wow! May mga Pinoy na nagbabasa nito! Heheh… la lang. :)


	5. Ahahah! Sara!

**The Poring **

**5: Ahahah! Sara!**

_XxxXoooXoOOxxoX! _

A quiet night in Prontera. In the square, only one living being was there—a lost novice1. That is, until, a certain blonde thief decided to barge in.

"Let's jet, Ses!" screamed Lidia once out in the Pronteran City Square.

"You said it, boss!" mewled Sessy.

The Poring, at the sounds of their voices, woke up. Talatsu inside the Poring also woke up. "Hmph. The thief girl. Where are you taking me?"

"You shut up and be a nice li'l weapon. You're gonna be sold goods soon!" answered Lidia, jetting as fast as she could.

"And, pray tell, how? Even though you can convince everyone that there are weapons inside this creature worth zillions of zeny, they won't be able to see us for themselves…"

"Oh, I don't know, since I have _this _after all…" Lidia got a green apple2 from her pocket. "This'll make the Poring do whatever I say… even though in fits of demonic possession. Ha-ha!"

Talatsu fell silent.

"Wow, it shut up, finally! I thought you're as unbearable as your weilder, Skurai! Hahahahah… OOF!" In her moment of over-confidence, Lidia made the mistake of not watching where she's going…

She collided against a certain tall, blonde warrior woman with a big-arse sword. "Eep!" Lidia, who was holding the unripe apple that would have tamed the Poring, watched as it flung from her grasp and rolled harmlessly away… stopping at the feet of the Novice. ("LOLZ ty ty ty!!1!1")

"Well, this is interesting," Talatsu said smugly as he watched Sara loom over Lidia's fallen figure. "You…" the now-dangerous Valkyrie drew her sword and pointed it at Lidia's neck.

"Meeps..!!!" was all Lidia could say. _Of all people, of all times, why Sara Irine?! _She thought to herself regretfully.

_XxxxOxxxxooooOOOOx!_

The warlock may have been KO'd quite effectively by the thief, but no creature on earth (or Rune-Midgard, for that matter) could stay asleep for long when he or she's in the same room as Iris Irine.

Fenris opened her eyes, waking abruptly to the sound of Iris' snoring… and the first thing she felt was the rather painful bump on her head.

"Ow… ow," she mumbled. At first she pondered whether she fell off the bed or if she chose to sleep on the floor… which was quite unlikely since she sleeps very still and she wasn't the type who enjoyed getting back-aches from sleeping on the floor. Then, she remembered…

_"Are you up to something again, Lidia?"_

_"Oh! You wanna sleep! I got Spore-spores here! They'll make you sleepy! Here!" _

Fenris frowned. Asides from being had by the thief, she was beaten in a most humiliating manner: mushroom spore poisoning. Besides her having a bump on her head, apparently Spore spores (sounds redundant, but that's what they are) have a 'hallucinogenic' effect with them; she remembered dreaming in technicolor. And that dream involved her, the gang in colorful costumes (she distinctly remembered Loki in a kitty costume and Skurai as a member of Kiss) and tons and tons of flowers in Komodo… so, in other words, she was drugged. Temporarily…

Looking around, she noticed something: the group's moneybag, which was her responsibility, was gone.

"I'll get her…" the warlock muttered to herself, putting on her shoes and running outside. "I'll bet she's still in the Town Square… I haven't slept for that long."

_xxX0oXxoooXXX!_

"You know, first time I saw you, I didn't want to kill you… thief," Sara took a step nearer to her, "But I've lost a few good scraps of dignity back there. That merits for… how many hours of torture?"

Sessy ran for her and her two-tails' lives.

"Eep! Ses…!!!" Lidia said helplessly as she saw her pet run. "Lidia! I'll try to call for help!" it said.

"Hmph. Don't bother, kitty, it'll be too late by that time…" Sara muttered.

Loki, by that time, was hiding at the shadows of a nearby building. "Should I or shouldn't I…?" he thought to himself. Although it would be relieving to have the thief out of commission for a while courtesy of the Valkyrie, he thought about his duties as an Assassin of the Cross, you know, "keeping the balance in Rune-Midgard" and everything. "… maybe I should watch first…"

Lidia bit her lower lip. But she had a good idea. "Er… Poring-thing…? Why don't you eat her weapon?" she said to the Poring in demonic possession.

"Ahahah! I would rather watch this!" answered Talatsu.

"Eh?! Why not?! Come on, you should treat your new body right!"

Sara blinked. "The creature talks." She stated.

"No, 'tis Talatsu talking, my dear, dear Valkyrie," Talatsu said through the Poring. It turned to Lidia. "And, no. If she attacks you, blood will flow… And I shall be able to feed!"

"Ugh…" Lidia said, edging away from the Haeryongdo. "Laevatein…!! You're not going to let Talatsu get away with this, are you?"

The Poring's aura changed. The white glow came back, and the monster donned a gentler facial expression. "… eh," replied Laevatein.

"… huh? I thought you were the good weapon! What do you mean, 'eh'?"

"Er… I kind of heard from Talatsu that you KO'd my mistress with a bunch of mushroom spores…" The Poring looked uneasily at Lidia.

"But Sara's gonna kill me!" Lidia said in despair.

The Poring bit its lip. "I dunno…" But then, a sudden change of aura. The glow became reddish-pinkish-whitish (what kind of color is that?) and its eyes became a bit sharper. "NO! We gotta help her!"

Silence. "Who the hell's that?" asked Lidia.

"It's me! Vision3!" said the Poring… apparently now being possessed by Chaos' weapon.

"…. I didn't know you talked," commented Sara.

"I didn't know either," if the Poring had shoulders, Vision would have made it shrug. "Anyway… you're planning to kill one of my boss' friends! And that's just plain wrong! So… don't do it!" said Vision in a heroic way… which of course sounded kind of cheesy.

Sara frowned. "I'm not sure your boss even likes this girl, anyway…"

"But it's just plain wrong to kill!" insisted Vision.

"Yeah… but I'm a bad girl…" the Valkyrie shrugged.

_XxOxxOOOXxxx0oX! _

Meanwhile, Loki, still unseen in the shadows, was waiting for the right time to strike… when the Valkyrie was most vulnerable (having no weapon is a great disadvantage, and he knows how freakin' strong Sara is.). But unconsciously, he was watching and debating with himself whether to help Lidia or not. He figured he has about… 3 options:

a) Help Lidia - The pros would be the keeping of the balance in Rune-Midgard, justice (although he was neutral, he still abided by the law…) and the maintenance of the aesthetic component of the town square. But doing this would mean having Lidia get away with his and the other's weapons… or her being truly convinced that he must be her "eternal other half". Which generally gives him the heebie-jeebies.

b) Let Sara kill Lidia – This, of course is a bad thing because his conscience would forever plague him, and besides, the Assassin's Guild might demote him from his high-and-mighty position as an Assassin of the Cross. But he misses his Swords of the Shadows badly…

c) Wake up others – he doubt if this will help at all. Iris will be bent on vengeance (You killed my daddy! WAAAAH! Die!), Chaos will make a speech about 'the horrors of bloodshed' again, Fenris… well, maybe she could help, but then she might not because she was just drugged by Lidia… and Skurai might be an old man already by this hour.

His thoughts were interrupted when his senses picked up a certain scent in the air. Spore-spores… He suddenly saw non-existing colors in front of his eyes. Because of this, his other senses were temporarily useless.

He didn't hear running footsteps behind him in time. He turned around… a split second too late.

_Xxx00oooXoXoooXXXX! _

**CRASH! **

Before Sara could make another move, or before Lidia could scream in terror, or before Vision could make another heroic speech, a certain collision happened. Turning around, they saw a pair of bodies entangled in an… _ahem_… interesting manner.

The Valkyrie's eyes widened. "Oh my. Fenris Fenrir and the Assassin." Was all she could say.

Apparently, Loki was hiding so effectively in the shadows that Fenris, running at super speed (take note! SUPER speed) towards the empty town square, didn't see him. She crashed into him, and now both warriors are on the ground, moaning.

The Poring switched to Laevatein mode and gasped. "M… mistress?!" It would have hopped over to Fenris, but it was… shocked. "Oh dear…"

Fenris opened her eyes the first time after collision… and was suddenly very aware of her position. Loki was underneath her, their legs were in a tangle, one of Loki's hands was laying _very near _her behind, both of her hands were behind his head… And staring at Loki's tomato-red face, she realized that he was as aware as she was. "Ack…!!" she choked.

"lolz get a rm!!11!!" the novice who got the unripe apple shouted at them.

"It's not what it seems!" the two shouted desperately at the same time.

Sara giggled at first, then laughed loudly and arrogantly afterwards. "Oh, really now?! It seems as if you two are doing _what it seems_!"

Lidia was at a loss for words, her face aghast.

Fenris blushed. "N… no! Ugh… (Of all people, why Sara?!)" She clumsily got up, but Loki somehow regained his composure first and helped her up along the way.

(Meanwhile, the Poring which was in Laevatein mode earlier was now having a battle in its tummy. Talatsu was arguing with Vision. _"I want blood! And I want it now!" "No! We have to help our friends!" "The girl's not even your friend! And since when did you learn how to talk…?!" _)

"Ha ha ha ha! Anyway… don't wriggle out just yet, girl," she said to Lidia, who was inching away quickly from the edge of the Haeryongdo. "Now… despite the circumstances, I really can't waste any more time…"

Before any of them could react, the Haeryondo was raised, ready to strike down Lidia with all force….

But after the 'flashes of her life' stage, Lidia heard a bouncy sound and a familiar, "THE BLOODSHED STOPS NOW!" rather than the bloody doom of the Haeryongdo on her pretty blonde head. She opened her eyes… and saw that the Sword of Retribution4 bounced away from Sara's reach, and that a Vision-possessed Poring was in front of her.

"The hell?!" Sara screamed. The novice made a move to get the Haeryongdo with his grubby paws, but the Valkyrie cast a quick "CRIMSON PYRE!4  
that charred him and put him out of commission.

Sessy ran over to Lidia and rubbed her all over. "AAH! LIDIA! I THOUGHT YOU GOT KILLED!" it cried kitty tears.

"Oh my gawd!" Lidia screamed. She hugged Sessy back. "I thought I got killed!"

"Grr…" Sara Irine teleported from her spot to where her Haeryongdo was lying harmlessly. "Don't get too comforted yet!"

"Sara…!!! Stop!" Fenris yelled, running in front of Lidia. "You'll have to face me first!"

"Tch!" the tall, scantily-clad warrior woman (I assume you know who I'm talking about) lowered her sword and observed her. "I suppose you'll do that without your weapon…?"

Fenris nodded. Loki stepped up. "Valkyrie… before you face the women, you'll have to challenge me first." He gestured for the Warlock to back away.

Lidia sighed, little hearts popping out of her eyes again. Then, she hid herself and Sessy behind Fenris, who held on to her shoulder.

Sara frowned. "You don't have your weapons, either. Are you really that stupid?!" she demanded.

"We're just victims of circumstance," replied Loki. He pointed to the Poring… which was already beside Sara.

"Wha…?!"

"AAAAH!" Vision-possessed Poring chomped down on the edge of the Haeryongdo.

"!!!!" Sara swung her sword around in an attempt to shake off the Poring, but Vision's steely determination helped in swallowing it faster. The Valkyrie ground her teeth violently. "You…!!!"

"Now we're even," said Loki, taking a step closer and enabling his bone armor. "Now we fight."

Sara glared at him, but smiled sadistically afterwards. "Don't be so cocky so soon, assassin." From a sheath hanging on her thigh, she drew a short sword—Shinryongdo5. "Now I have a change to display its power…"

The Poring was too busy having an internal battle to know for itself what's going on. (_"No! You stupid sword! Stay! I MUST SEE BLOOD!" "AAAH!" "Oh dear…"_)

Loki frowned. But he still had to do what he had to do… for the women's sake. "Let's go."

At super speed, the woman with a much smaller sword and the man in the skeleton suit ran towards each other. At the same time, both players readied their weapons (for Loki, his sharp, bone-armored hand) and prepared to strike upon contact…

"AHAHAHAHAH!!!!"

They froze in mid-air. (Loki, being unable to levitate, landed back on the ground shortly afterwards.)

Skurai ran in the square, crow's feet adorning his face and his bluish-black hair having a few streaks of white, towards the Poring. The Cursed Prosecutor hugged it immediately. "Ah! I almost died of old age!" he screamed. Immediately, his normal looks were restored.

Sara had a funny look of disbelief on her face. Well, seeing the Dread Skurai, make-up and all, in the middle of the night in town wearing only pajamas and hugging a Poring will do that to you. "What is this?!" she yelled.

Skurai turned to her. "Hmph…!!! Ahah! Sara, isn't it! AHAHAHAH! What a small world we have!!"

_XxoOOxxOOxxx0xxXoX! _

1 The novice mentioned here is a stereotype, isn't he? I'm sure my fellow RO players have met him in one instance or another… (although he's a slightly different version in pRO. XD)

2 Unripe Apple – if you remember, I mentioned in the previous chapters that this is the Poring's taming item. It's expensive for our heroes, but Lidia is richer than she lets on.

3 Vision – Chaos' trusted weapon, which once was gifted with Tyrfing's powers! By special request, Vision talked. I originally made him to be like Chaos, but I don't know how he turned out…

4 Sword of Retribution / Haeryongdo – two ways of calling Sara's larger sword.

5 Shinryongdo – I'm pretty sure Sara stole this one too. You can find it in her picture at Book 5. Kind of looks like Chernyongdo (Iris' sword) but it's there… I don't know how it functions though.

Author's notes: I'm saddened. I was on a roll, but then our profs gave us tons of homework, and I didn't write this continuously. I must have gotten lost in the middle of the fic… anyway, once again, OOC-ness; I think I made Loki too nasty, don't you think? I tried my hardest not to make Lidia suffer (since I'm a good girl and all) but I'm not very fond of her… sigh

Oh yes, please review! I'm not pushing you or anything, but I'd appreciate it if you let me know that you've read this piece. Thanks.


	6. Strange Senses of Style

**The Poring **

By: zhakeena

Disclaimers: Aw, come on, do you really expect somebody who wastes her time writing fanfiction to be somebody rich and powerful enough to own Ragnarök: Into the Abyss? Or Ragnarok Online, for that matter?!

Warnings: AU, extreme OOC, Crossover (RagOnline and Rag the Manwah), and certain pointless scenes. Eheh.

Chapter 5 (or was it 6… can't recall.): Strange Senses of Style

--

Chaos grunted as he blinked his eyes a numerous times to wake himself up. He shifted to his side and saw the ancient alarm clock read: 2.15 AM. "Hrmm… better get some sleep again…."

Shifting to his other side, he tried to sleep again… only to find out that the other Spartan beds were empty. "Hmm?" he grunted again, sitting up and yawning. After blinking and confirming that Loki and Skurai were gone, he shook his head. "What are those two doing… having a date or something?" he asked himself grumpily.

Yawning again and scratching his tummy, he got up and groggily walked out of the room and knocked on the girls' room. "Better let them find out anyway…" he thought to himself as he waited for somebody to open the door.

Problem is, nobody answered. He realized this after 2 minutes of no response and when he found out that he was falling asleep on his feet. "Hmm… funny. I thought Fenris was a light sleeper," he thought. He knocked again. No answer.

"Oh-kay, this is strange." A bit more awake now, he went to his room, got the key to the girls' room, and went out again to unlock their door. Praying that nobody sleeps in the nude (although the small, perverted part of his mind says otherwise), he opened the door.

"Iris?" he called out. She was the only one in the room… snoring loudly. Fenris and Lidia weren't anywhere.

"Iris… wake up." Chaos shook her a bit. Iris muttered something like "Mmm… Chaos you have three heads?"

The Rune Knight frowned. "I hate it when she dreams strange stuff about me," he thought to himself before shaking her a bit more violently, "Iris, wake up!"

"AAAAH! Bigfoot!" she screamed, slapping Chaos' face hard. The strike was so strong he flung backwards and crashed on the floor. Iris sat up, breathing hard. "Ooh… where am I? Chaos?" she peered at him from the side of the bed. "What are you doing here? Anyway, I'm soooo glad that you're here… I had a nightmare that you had three heads and a Bigfoot was eating Lidia's head."

Chaos groaned in agony as he stood up. "Iris, you slapped me!" he exclaimed.

"Oh. Sorry… hey, you're not allowed here!" she pointed an accusing finger at him. "Why are you visiting me in the middle of the night?!"

"Don't get the wrong idea, Iris… I just noticed that Loki and Skurai aren't in my room, so I thought I should let you girls find out…" He flinched as he rubbed his sore cheek. "Problem is, Lidia and Fenris are gone too… I wonder what happened…"

Iris blinked in confusion. She took a look around the room and realized that, indeed, her roommates were gone. "Oh, dear… how about the Poring?"

"It's gone too…"

"Do you think they ditched us for some reason?" she asked.

Chaos thought for a while. "No… I can't find a real reason in my head right now. I considered the possibility that Loki and Skurai were dating, though… heheh," he said, chuckling at his own joke.

"Maybe they went all went out on a double date…" Iris said, giggling for herself too.

"You know, I've always thought that Loki had the hots for Fenris… but…" Chaos trailed off with a look of disgust on his face. Iris caught on his trail of thought and frowned.

"Lidia and Skurai?! No way!" they said in unison.

Silence.

"You think we better go look for them?" Iris asked.

"… yeah. Let's dress up… and you might as well bring Chernyongdo with you," said Chaos as he left the room.

--

"You…!!!" Sara seethed as she pointed Shinryongdo angrily at the pajama-clad Skurai, "What the hell are you doing here?! You've disturbed me in my terrorism of these so-called heroes!"

Skurai looked at her mockingly. "Ahah! Call that terrorism? You must be losing your touch, _Valkyrie_!" He stood up, still hugging the Talatsu-possessed Poring.

"Losing my touch…" the insulted Valkyrie glared at him. "I'll show you, _Cursed Prosecutor_. Even without Haeryongdo, I can crush your bones and transform them into more accessories…" She pushed Loki aside. The surprised assassin fell ungracefully on the ground.

"Ahahahah! You barely wear anything but accessories, anyway! What sort of woman parades around in Prontera at 2 in the morning wearing a bikini?" he said as he held the Poring. "Talatsu, transform!" The Poring deformed into a giant sword… a giant pink jelly sword with cute little beady eyes. "Ooh… fantastic. I shall feed… that I shall. Ahaha!" Talatsu rejoiced.

Sara's jaw dropped in disbelief. "Why, you perverted Goth wannabe! How dare you insult my fashion sense when you wear that stupid black make-up of yours!" She brandished Shinryongdo and charged at Skurai. The Prosecutor, however, was ready enough to block her attack with Talatsu (version 57: Jelly-blob function).

Meanwhile, Lidia (still seated on the floor), Fenris (standing next to her), and Loki (still on the floor after being pushed ungracefully by Sara) were watching dumb-founded as the two deadliest people in Rune-Midgard battle it out in pajamas and bikinis. "You know, I've always thought that they'll fight someday… but not because of an argument concerning their strange senses of style," Lidia said in amazement.

"But you have to admit… they do have rather interesting fashion senses," added Fenris.

They paused to watch Skurai laugh like a maniac as he dodged a few powerful and colorful rune spells from the angry Sara Irine.

"They might end up causing Prontera's destruction," commented Loki blankly.

"Gee, I don't know about you guys, but I'm staying out of this one. Those two can crush us like the Abysmal Knight can crush a level-1 novice," said Lidia, hiding even more behind Fenris. The warlock shook her head. "Perhaps… but we were responsible for this city once… what do you suggest we do, Loki?" she asked.

Loki shrugged.

"Ahah! I see Geffen, I see Izlude! I see Sara almost in the nude!" chanted Skurai as he Magnum-broke Sara… and missed.

"Pervert!" The Valkyrie's face was as red as her sister's hair when she threw another flaming rune card at Skurai. "Eat this! Crimson Pyre!"

--

Kaboom.

Chaos and Iris looked at where the sound and exploding lights came from. "Over there! At the center of the city!" They ran as fast as they could. Frightened Pronterans were beginning to awake and started staring at the fireworks.

"I wonder what they got themselves into—" Iris froze mid-sentence when they finally reached the center of the city. Chaos' jaw dropped.

Finally, a powerful fire bolt hit Skurai on the shoulder. He hissed and held his shoulder. The Talatsu-Poring hissed too, but in annoyance. It dropped on the ground, away from Skurai's reach. Sara smirked as she victoriously marched over to him, collared him and pointed Shinryongdo at his neck. "Now… Skurai…" she began, her voice even and deadly.

Skurai glared at her. "What are you going to do to me now, Valkyrie?" he said, a wicked smile still forming at his lips.

Sara let the blade touch his skin; a red line was beginning to appear. Lidia, Fenris and Loki watched with bated breath as she began telling him the many ways she'll enjoy killing him…

When a shrill shout came from somewhere, totally ruining the scene. "SARAAAAAA!"

Sara visibly flinched at the sound of the voice. When she realized who it was, she rolled her eyes. "Oh gods…" she muttered in annoyance.

Iris, with a confused Chaos trailing behind her, stomped her way towards Sara, Chernyongdo gripped tightly on one armored hand. The Poring instantly went to its original, innocent Poringy self and speedily hopped behind Iris and hid.

Sara narrowed her eyes at her. She sighed, stamped a rune card on Skurai's face, and glared at her. The rune card paralyzed Skurai effectively. "What now?" she asked in annoyance.

"You killed my father! You killed Payon!" Iris began, but Sara cut her off, "Yeah, yeah. You've said it all before… are you asking for a beating from your infinitely-more powerful and more beautiful older sister?" she asked coldly.

Iris' jaw dropped in disbelief. "WHAT?! Infinitely more beautiful?! The powerful part I could let slip, but…" she started charging at Sara, but Chaos restrained her. "Don't! She'll kill you with one blow!" he cried.

"She has the nerve to call me ugly?!"

"She didn't! Trust me!" Chaos said, a vein threatening to pop on his forehead.

Sara laughed mockingly as she watched her little sister thrash around. "Iris, Iris, Iris… you may be well-endowed, but you're so… plain."

"PLAIN?!" Iris struggled within Chaos' grasp even harder. "Why you…"

"You gotta admit, Iris," said Lidia, smiling wickedly herself, "she's kind of right…"

"What?!" Iris turned to the thief. This time, Chaos didn't stop her when she ran to her and started another one of their cat fights. "As if you're some exotic beauty yourself, honey!" she said, slapping her head. (Head, not face. Ow.)

"Hey, I'm pale and I'm from Morroc! I should be proud that the gods gave me such beauty!" Lidia retorted, pinching her face. The Poring watched in mild amusement as the two girls started doing noogies, slaps and moogie-pinches at each other.

Fenris and Loki backed away from their fight. "Oh dear… we're starting to wake up some people…" said Fenris, looking at the growing crowd who was watching them.

"They might be sending some guards soon enough," said Loki, nodding his head.

"Oi…" Chaos sighed, putting a hand to his face. "And to think, all I wanted to do was to level-up," he muttered.

Sara smirked. "I never intended to decimate anyone in this town, but you guys just had to cross paths with me. Shame," she said. Turning to Skurai, she pinched his face mockingly. "How about you, make-up boy? Having fun yet? I think I'll take my sweet time killing you in front of the Pronteran public… using my two hands only…" she said in a dull tone.

Skurai's eyes widened. "You're turning me on. You sounded like a dominatrix back there. Ahah!" he said.

Silence. Chaos, Loki and Fenris turned to them, their eyes as wide as plates.

Sara slapped his face. "You really are a pervert!" she yelled in disbelief.

"WOOT! Let's see some action!" A few Pronteran denizens (mostly swordies in their nighties) started cheering.

Mortified, Sara turned to them and blasted a rather large fire spell at them. With their hairs alight, they started running and pleading with acolytes and priests to take care of them. She turned back to Skurai… who was smiling maliciously.

"That's it. Forget about killing you slowly. I'll just stab your gut right here, right now," she muttered. She positioned herself to stab Skurai in the gut, but when she did…

She realized that a Poring was already eating her hand. "What the--!!" she screamed. She pulled her hand back, but the Shinryongdo wasn't in her grasp anymore. The Poring burped happily.

More silence. Even Lidia and Iris stopped mid-fight.

"Ahahahahahahahahahahahah – gasp – ahahahahahahah! You really are losing your touch, Miss Irine," said Skurai, although still frozen.

The Poring was once again possessed by Talatsu. "Oh great. Another roommate," he muttered.

"Shut up," Sara kicked the Poring, but she found out that it was as hard as a boulder.

"It's no use, Sara… You can't get your weapons back unless we successfully tame that thing," Chaos said nonchalantly.

Sara looked at him angrily. "So… you mean….?!" She began, but she looked down and shook her head. "No… I don't have to. I think I'll just take this thing away from you cretins." Before anyone could stop her, she was already taking the Poring and was already preparing to teleport. She disappeared with the Poring before anyone could say a word.

"… she is gone." Loki said simply.

Chaos groaned. "Oh no! Our weapons!"

Skurai began to panic. "Ahah! I shall grow old again!" he said in lamentation.

Lidia snapped her fingers. "Darn… there goes the moolah…" she mumbled.

Fenris grit her teeth. "She's good…" she muttered. She turned to Iris. "Iris! I think I can track her down with my magic… can you open up a warp portal for us?" she asked.

Iris shook her head. "Sorry, Fenris…" she said apologetically. "But I don't know the spell yet…"

"Damn…" Fenris muttered. "What do we do…" she thought.

"I guess we gotta brain-storm…" said Chaos, calling everyone to huddle around the still-petrified Skurai. They all sat down thinking when something suddenly tapped Chaos' shoulder. They looked up at the person.

A shy, female acolyte with wide brown eyes was blushing when they faced her. "I'm sorry for disturbing you… but if you want, I could warp all of you." She said meekly.

"Why… thank you!" Chaos said, standing up. "Yeah… we'd like that!"

"Hey, wait a minute… you're gonna overcharge us, ain't you?!" Lidia said skeptically. The acolyte shook her head. "Oh, no, ma'am! I want to do this for the heroes of Prontera…" she said, beaming.

"Hmph. Must be fun being a celebrity," muttered Skurai.

"Oh, it is, believe me, Skurai," said Iris, grinning. "So… Fenris, start searching for Sara so we can get going!"

Fenris nodded as she stood up. She chanted some spells under her breath. She started glowing… then the spell was over. She opened her eyes and frowned. "That's weird…" she muttered.

"Why?"

She turned to Iris. "She's at Payon. And the way I see it… it's reconstructed again."

Iris blinked.

"So! Payon it is," said the acolyte, clapping her hands together. "Watch out, everybody! There's going to be a gaping hole on the floor," she said as she began casting her spell. A warp portal opened. Lidia, Iris, Fenris and Loki stepped in and disappeared. Chaos had to drag the frozen Skurai with him to the warp portal.

"Hey! Do you think they sell clothes in Payon?!" asked Skurai, suddenly aware that he's only in his pajamas.

"Yeah, yeah, now let's go!" muttered Chaos as they both disappeared in the portal.

The acolyte named Veronica smiled. "It's so nice helping people…" she said sweetly before going back to the Sanctuary to get some sleep. By the time the Pronteran Chivalry arrived on their Pecopecos, the warriors were already gone. They shrugged and went back home to get some sleep as well.

---

A few notes for the clueless:

1. Bigfoot – a monster that looks like a very large grizzly bear.

2. Abysmal Knight and Level-1 Novice – Abysmal Knight is a very, very strong enemy… almost good enough to be an MVP boss. And if you're a level-1 novice and you see this guy… well, you're screwed, man.

3. Geffen and Izlude – Geffen is sometimes spelled as "Geffin" in the manwah for some reason. Izlude is also excluded in the story, but in the game, Izlude is the satellite city of Prontera. I just used it since I can actually rhyme it with something…

4. Sara's Rune Cards – I think these are what she uses to cast her deadliest spells like Crimson Pyre and her paralysis spell… whatever it's called.

5. Veronica – a little cameo I decided to do. Veronica is one of our original characters. She looks like your typical acolyte (the one with brown hair and a ponytail)

6. Payon – in the manwah, this town was decimated. In the game, it's where kill-stealing archers and hunters live. (Pardon my bitterness.) I decided to revive this town for the sake of the story.

7. Pronteran Chivalry – where little Swordsmen become powerful, burly Knights! XD I think their duty is to protect Prontera… but seeing as how Knights act these days (being bots and all), they will be even more ineffective in protecting their mother country than how I portrayed them.

Author's notes: Geez. You'd think I'd have a lot of time during the sembreak, but I got lazy, sorry. Anyway, too much OOC again… but with a title like "The Poring," do you really expect anything less? XD

Oh, and I'm sorry if I shocked some of you with the Sara/Skurai-ness. I can't help myself. XD

Next chapter: We see another old friend. But the Poring is more merciful on her.


End file.
